Penelope Kitten has concerns about the validity of this classic Christmas story…
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11:30pm. The night before Christmas.
Cynthia and the cats are getting ready for bed.
Cynthia: Shall I read us a Christmas story?
penelope kitten (squeaking): yeah yeah.
Cynthia: C’mon, Marcy. It’ll be fun.
Cynthia: Okay. Here goes.
‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring,
Not even a mouse –
penelope kitten (panicking): gasp. monty! he’s always stirring.
Penelope Kitten races off to the the kitchen to make sure Monty’s okay.
Cynthia: Who’s Monty?
Marcy: Monty the Mouse who resides behind the microwave.
Cynthia (sighing): Really? You guys let a mouse live in our house?
Marcy: That’s debatable.
Cynthia (dropping her head into her hands): And, behind the … microwave?!
Penelope Kitten yells/squeaks from the kitchen.
penelop kitten: he better be okay, marcy very much! or i’m holding you responsible!
Marcy: Monty’s a redundant rodent. But P likes him so I let him live. For now anyway.
Cynthia (muttering to herself): Why? … Why? … Why don’t I have normal cats?
Penelope Kitten trots back to the bedroom, leaps back on the bed and settles in.
penelope kitten: it’s alright. he’s stirring.
Marcy: What’s he stirring now?
penelope kitten: extra marshmallows in his hot choc.
Cynthia looks up aghast.
penelope kitten (explaining): it’s his fave.
Cynthia drops her head back into her hands, muttering.
penelope kitten: go on with the story now, please. don’t worry. monty is fine.
Cynthia continues to mutter to herself.
penelope kitten (to Marcy): what’s next?
Marcy: I don’t care.
penelope kitten: i do.
Marcy: Something about sugar plums, reindeer with unfortunate names, and a bowlful of jelly.
penelope kitten: oh. monty doesn’t like jelly.
Happy Happy Holidays!