Marcy: As you can see from the chart above, cat purrs are scientifically proven to be medically therapeutic to you humans. It lowers your stress, blood pressure, and swelling. It helps you to breathe and heals your strained muscles and broken bones.
Cynthia cocks her head to the side looking confused and somewhat skeptical.
Cynthia: Well… I don’t think they are taking into account your terrorist tendencies towards my toes and how your attacks on them at 3am leave me shaken, stressed out, and, quite frankly… bloody.
Marcy: Yes, but after my attacks, I heal you with my cat super powers. You can call me God now.
Cynthia (shaking her head): Yeah, I don’t know, Marcy. I think they cancel each other out.
Marcy: How about I cancel you out.
Cynthia: Marcy! No need to get vicious. I’m just saying that I don’t think I am getting much of a benefit here if you have the power to increase my blood pressure and then have the power to lower it but then increase it again.
Marcy: That’s the point, Cindy. I have power over you. I am a Goddess. This is a scientific fact.
Cynthia: But this post was supposed to be about how adopting a cat or two is good for one’s health – a Cat BITE (Big Important Tip, Everyone) – not one of your delusional rants.
Marcy: A cat bite always hurts a little.
Cynthia: Well, I wish you would use your powers for good and not evil a little more often.
Marcy: I can do that! Thank you to Friends of the Palo Alto Animal Shelter and designer JJ Tso Graziano for sharing this wonderfully concise and informative info graphic about the good cats do for humans.
Cynthia: Ah… much better.
Marcy: Please consider adding a feline friend goddess or two to your household. Not only will you save their lives … you might also save your own.