Cynthia: Oh my gosh! Did you see Lady Mary’s new haircut on last week’s Downton Abbey?
Marcy: Yeah. So.
Cynthia: So… it’s so modern and unexpected.
Marcy: That haircut is over 90 years old.
Cynthia: But on the show it’s brand new. And … quite scandalous.
Cynthia: I thought it was so thrilling when she walked into the drawing room with her new ‘do and art deco dress.
Cynthia: Shocking, really.
Marcy: You’re a prude.
Marcy: Scandalous? Thrilling? Shocking? What are you, a Dowager Countess wannabe? Are you going to wear a giant skirt with a bustle and swoon at the sight of an ankle? Do you need smelling salts or something?
Cynthia: You know, Marcy, Vanity Fair just did an entire article debating whether Lady Mary was a sociopath because she’s so mean and unfeeling. And she’s like that for absolutely no reason. She has everything.
Marcy narrows her eyes and swishes her tail back and forth.
Marcy: What are you saying?
Cynthia: That you exhibit the same sociopathic tendencies as Lady Mary sometimes. And for no reason. You have everything.
Marcy: Ahhh… I’m not a sociopath. I’m just a cat.
Cynthia: Well, you can’t spell sociopath without c-a-t.
Marcy slinks off sadly. Cynthia feels horrible and rushes after her. She pets Marcy’s head.
Cynthia: Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I’m so sorry, Marcy.
Marcy lays her head on Cynthia’s arm and looks up at her blinking.
Marcy: Lady Marcy.