The Pros and Cons of a cat swimsuit
Cynthia is perusing the internet. Marcy wanders in, looking for someone to antagonize.
Marcy: So what are you doing?
Cynthia: Looking for a new swimsuit.
Marcy: I thought you liked your ratty 14 year old lime green tankini.
Cynthia: Not really.
Marcy: I thought you were in looooove with it.
Cynthia: No I –
Marcy: I thought you wanted to marry it.
Cynthia: Wow. You’re really out of insults lately, aren’t you? That was pretty lame.
Marcy: Yeah. I need to restock. Please help me.
Cynthia: What do you think of this cat swimsuit by Ugly Duckling Gal Angel over at Etsy?
Marcy looks at the photo above.
Cynthia: I was thinking that since bathing suits are the most stressful piece of attire out there – why not go crazy and get a crazy one? That way, no one will look at my cellulite and varicose veins and flabby parts, they’ll look only at my swimsuit in utter amazement and say “Hey! Holy Cow! That is a crazy cat one-piece!”
Marcy: “Holy Cow” is exactly what they’ll be saying.
Cynthia (suddenly doubtful): I don’t know, though. This cat swimsuit is kind of … really cool. The question is… Will it look as cool on me?
Cynthia: So then we’re back to crazy instead of chic. Sigh… Still, that was the whole idea in the first place. Hmmm…
Marcy happily wanders off, her insults restocked, and hoping to find someone else to antagonize.
Cynthia continues to stare at the cat suit.
Cynthia (suddenly yelling): OMG! I want that cat swimsuit!